~Synopsis~
Brennan O’Shea might be every woman’s dream. Gorgeous.
Single.
Built like a tank and inked to perfection.
A fireman. Really, what else is there?
Yeah, he’s a fantasy brought to life if only it weren’t for one little problem. Okay, it’s a big one. He can’t talk to women. The more attractive the lady, the more words fail him. And his beautiful, friendly neighbor Jenny has Brennan lusting for more than chatty banter. Will a birthday wish give him a shot with the woman he wants? Or will his hopes go up in flames?
~Review~
1 Star
Brennan O’Shea is
dreading turning thirty. He’s still single, but he’d rather be settled down
with his spunky neighbor next door, Jenny.
But things might turn around if he can have a dirty thirty with his big
crush.
Told via Brennan’s sole point of
view, the premise sounded cute. But it turned out to have two major issues that
made the story a dud.
First, there is way too much OW
drama for all the longer this short
story is. I liked Jenny right off the bat when she was depicted as a no
manwhore kind of girl. And Brennan is no manwhore so I have no idea why the
story is loaded with so many details about his annoying ex.
“All those weeks with Amber were worth something if I learned how to rock Jenny’s world.”
That’s what Brennan is
thinking when he’s going down on Jenny! Ugh, yuck—who needs those type of
details? If all the references to sex
with Amber was meant to show that the guy is still talented in the sack despite
being challenged in the conversation department then that could have easily
been illustrated by showing the reader via the loves scenes between him and
Jenny. But that doesn’t happen, which leads into my second issue with the story...
It ends abruptly just as
Brennan and Jenny are about to do the deed!
So what the reader basically get is too many pages devoted to references
to dating Amber and how she still makes him hard and very little in the way of relationship
development between Brennan and Jenny other than some insta lust. The story
stops at 50% with a HFN, and the rest of the pages are excerpts from other stories. I one-clicked this
title as a freebie from Amazon; otherwise, I’d feel like it was a rip-off.
All in all, even as a short story, this is completely underdeveloped. The characters had some potential, but there's not enough development there either, and the OW drama overshadows the hints at romance.
All in all, even as a short story, this is completely underdeveloped. The characters had some potential, but there's not enough development there either, and the OW drama overshadows the hints at romance.
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